Real Housewives of New Jersey: PROSECUTION WHORE!!!

According to the New York Post and, like, every other reputable publication, human dolphin Teresa Guidice and her charming canned ham, Joe Guidice, were indicted on thirty-nine counts of fraud in federal court in Newark, New Jersey today. The charges arise out of bankruptcy fraud, the submission of fraudulent mortgage and other loan documents, and the couples’ failure to file five years’ worth of tax returns. The happy couple face up to thirty years in the Real Jailhouse of New Jersey, and a fine of up to one million dollars that they sooooo don’t have.

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