The Walking Dead: After

the-walking-dead-after-michonneThe prison is burning, and the walkers are having a hootenanny. Oh what’s this? Michonne, again walking freely among them. She looks tired and just a little bit pissed off. She finds two more zombies to keep as pets. When she stumbles across old man Hershel’s head, she puts its out of its misery. You know what this looks like? It looks like the beginnings of a very good season.

Carl and Rick are hobbling along a road. Well, Rick is hobbling, and Carl is kind of annoyed at the burden. They clear a house, find some food, and ten bucks says they happen upon Poor Man’s Jamie Lee Curtis in the next three episodes. For some reason they don’t make camp there, maybe it didn’t have granite countertops? So they clear another house, arguing over technique. Oh this is a nice house, hardwood floors, fireplace in the bedroom, is that Guitar Hero? But what’s really important are the television wires which can be used to tie the door closed. Shane taught Carl how to do it, “remember him?” Ouch, Carl.

Oh. My. Gawd. We get a Michonne flashback! She has a seriously hot lovah…and a sword. And a baby named Peanut. No, this is a dream. She’s talking to two men, who represent her zombie pets. Yup, they’ve got no arms. Nightmare! Michonne has all the feelings all at once!

The next morning, Carl makes himself a bowl of Frostie Flakes and tries to wake up his father. But Rick is in pretty bad shape…and there are zombies at the door. Ruh-roh. Carl sneaks around to the front of the house and lures them away from the front door. He’s kind of an idiot, and walks them down the road a bit…right into another zombie. Now he’s seriously outnumbered and at the bottom of a dead zombie pileup. Good work, Carl. Now vomit, put your sheriff hat back on, and go take care of your father. Carl is pretty proud of himself, but unfortunately Rick is unconscious and doesn’t hear any of his angry speech about how many people Rick couldn’t protect. “You just wanted to plant vegetables, you just wanted to hide….They’re all gone now, because of you….But now, you’re nothing.” This has turned into quite the After School Special.

Carl goes exploring on his own and finds some canned foods and…what’s that? A giant tin of chocolate pudding? Delicious, I’m sure. Zombies behind the door! Zombies! Carl shoots wildly and is now out of bullets. It’s hand-to-hand combat, and Carl loses a shoe in the process before trapping the zombie in a bedroom. Well, kid. You still have your feet. He writes “Walker inside got my shoe didn’t get me” on the door, sits on the roof eating the tin of chocolate pudding, and surveys the scene.

Michonne walks with her pets in a zombie herd, looking beaten, broken, deflated, and just downright miserable. All of the growling and rotting is getting her a little nuts. She needs another human. For no good reason, she slices the head off of a walker. Then another, and another, and another…her cover is blown, and she’s on a slashing frenzy. The last to go are her pets.

Carl stands guard over Rick who is…did he turn zombie? He’s reaching out to Carl and grabs his foot. Carl can’t shoot him. But Rick’s not dead yet. First, he has some parting words. “Go outside, stay safe.” Carl is scared and does not want to leave his dying father, but we all know that’s not going to end well.

Oh good, Rick is all better. Damn. I was kind of looking forward to seeing Carl on his own. Meanwhile, Michonne misses her boyfriend, Mike. To lift her spirits, she chops off another zombie head and wanders aimlessly. She finds Carl’s pudding can which is just such a coincidence. Is that…no, it can’t be! It’s Carl and Rick, inside the house, having a man-to-man talk. Knock knock knock. Landshark? No, it’s Michonne.

Next week, we see what happens to the rest of the group.

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