So how’s everybody doing on their island somewhere maybe near Japan, the Philippines, or Croatia? Marissa arrives at Redemption Island all sorts of blindsided and quickly turns it into BitchAndMoan Island. The returning contestants are all lovey dovey backrubby, but Colton is sooooo over it. The newbies are fishing with a Hawaiian sling that just magically appeared on the island because heaven forbid a Survivor contestant should go hungry. The women realize they are down on the numbers, so Rachel is trying to work her way into Dalliance (Dude Alliance, for those not keeping score). After bellies are filled and plans are formed, everyone heads to Redemption Island to witness the first duel.

Rupert, Candice, and Marissa enter the arena. Jeff announces that everybody has the ability to swap spots with their loved ones, but Gervase lets Marissa handle this one on her own. It’s the old “run a metal thing through another metal thing while holding onto a wooden spool and stacking the spool on top of a wobbly metal stand” challenge. And as a mini twisteroo, the first player to finish the challenge decides who gets a clue to the hidden immunity idol. A few boring minutes later, and sigh. In typical Rupert fashion, Rupert’s entire stack of spools falls over, sending him into a tizzy of last place. Candice finishes in first while Marissa is one spool away from completing the challenge and Rupert is nowhere in sight. And just like that, Rupert is the first one out of the game. Ugh. As expected, Candice gives the clue to her husband, John.

Dalliance comes up with a hair-brained scheme in case they lose the Immunity Challenge. They want to vote out Rachel because Tyson is the most likely loved one to switch places with her since he’s the yahoo who voted himself out of his tribe during the last go-round. I’m not sure what their end game is, other than vague mumblings about keeping the weakest players around, but I sure would enjoy watching Tyson embarrass himself again.

Over at the returning players’ camp, Colton is telling everyone who will listen that so-and-so wants to vote whats-her-name out. His plan is to cause chaos “because if there’s one thing I know, it’s that I can rule in chaos.” He wants everyone to realize it’s a game and not “National Lampoon’s Horrible Vacation,” but if he keeps this up, it’s going to be a little bit of both. Monica, who is pieced together from Octomom’s spare parts, tries to calm Colton down and then off and forms an alliance of five with a plan to vote Colton out at the first possible opportunity. Don’t you just love unabashed expressions of loyalty?

It’s another Immunity Challenge, and three members of each tribe will be tied together while pushing another member in a barrel through an obstacle-like course to collect bags of balls. Once they get the bags back to the start, another member plays the most boring game of skeeball ever. The winning team gets a whole mess of fishing gear even though you’d think a Hawaiian sling spear thing would be enough to get them through the game without starving. Gervase must have spent a lot of time in arcades as a kid because he was like a skeeball whisperer, winning the challenge for the returning players.

Back at camp, the newbies are strategizing. Good ol’ Southern boy Brad continues to be such a Brad and is looking forward to the next immunity challenge so that he can smash Gervase into the water, and when he comes up for air, body check him back down again. Nice. Dalliance discusses The Tyson Factor again, but John is nervous about voting out Rachel because if Tyson takes his spot at Redemption Island, he will have a good chance against Candice. But everybody else thinks John is hesitant to vote her out because he has a sub-alliance. Or maybe a romance? What this season needs is a good Temptation Island-style betrayal. But until then, we just have Ciera freaking out because she’s the decoy vote.

At Tribal Council, there’s boring yammering about hidden immunity idols, the dudes get called out for their alliance, and Rachel is voted out.

Next week, Tyson is given the opportunity to take Rachel’s spot and Colton sheds more tears. Also, don’t forget to watch The Amazing Race beginning on Sunday, right before the Breaking Bad series finale. It’s just like Survivor, only they actually go places and do things.

Photos: CBS

Reprinted from www.travelfreak.com