The kids are watching The Equestranauts in preparation for the Equestra Con, which is a convention for people who love the tiny horsie cartoon. Tina is bringing her toy pony, Chariot. But when they get there, it’s pretty much all men dressed up as colorful ponies. Sort of like your worst nightmare of what you might image a Bronie convention to be like, but everyone is much, much older.
Tina meets some new middle-aged friends—Sun Puddle Horseplay, Pony Danza, and Bronconious. She’s sort of in heaven, because everyone wants to talk about her favorite cartoon and, in this context, her jokes are funny. But it turns out that they’re just after her first addition Chariot doll. Once they con her out of her toy horse, they gallop away.
Bob wants to go down to the convention and get Tina’s pony doll back, but in order to do so, he has to get up to speed on the Equestranauts because the people he’s trying to infiltrate knows everything about the Equestranaut multiverse. Next step is a costume. And a pony name—Bobcefula.
Bobcefula runs into Bronconious, who thinks he looks ridiculous. Then, they go for face painting and break up for primping and grooming for the big party that evening.
Bobcefula’s cocktails are…strong. He says that he read a rumor about a really rare Equestranauts doll with major camel toe, but instead of answering the question, they dance. And drink. And climb into a van. And go to an afterparty, which is…much creepier. Then, Bronconious brings Bob back to his hotel room to see his collection of rare dolls. But Bronconious has an interesting use for Tina’s Chariot doll. He sucks on its nose because it keeps him young.
Then, Bob rambles on about zombie Equestranauts that he read about in Tina’s fanfic. Bronconious is not amused, and forces Bob to get an Equestranaut tattoo. Tina, Linda, Gene and Louise show up to save the day, or ruin everything. Tina barges in and says that they have ruined everything, and not just with the sexually charged awkward confusing vibe at the party.
Tina gets her pony back, Bob gets 1/10th of a tattoo, and Bob promises to call Sun Puddle soon.
Reprinted from SurvivingCollege.comby