Reprinted with permission from www.survivingcollege.com

Bender beat up Carlos, the elderly one-legged cowboy who lives next door, and took his cowboy hat. So they all go line dancing. Leela finds it enjoyable because there’s no touching and lots of rules. Bender tries out the mechanical bull and sets a new record for the shortest ride.

Everyone else gives the bull a whirl to hilariously predictable results. But when Leela takes her turn on the bull, her hand gets stuck and, well, the mechanical bull gets shot and Leela has a new bar record. Turns out she’s breaking out in suction cups, which is the first phase in the process of squidification. There’s no treatment other than insanely expensive medicine that will delay the process by a few months, and Fry pledges his unsquidified love for Leela and promises to find a way to get the money for the medicine. Leela is despondent. “Isn’t it bad enough that I occasionally lay an egg? Now I have to be a squid, too!”The group decides to sell the Planet Express to raise the funds, but Fry is an idiot and trades the ship for two giant magic beans. Farnsworth calls him an idiot and the beans end up out the window.That night, Leela decides to move underground, to the sewer. But just as she pulls up the manhole cover, she sees the giant beanstalk and decides to give it a climb. At the top, she finds a deluxe apartment in the sky, complete with rainbows and unicorns and “it’s like a fairy tale….” until she is captured by Momsanto. It’s her floating genetic engineering facility. The magic beans are actually genetically engineered combination elephant/bean beans. There is also a pine-u-porks—the delicious treat with built-in toothpicks.Momsanto tells Leela that she has some freaky genes and wants a look-see. A struggle ensues, and Leela’s boot falls from the sky. Luckily, they landed on Fry and Bender, who travel up to the deluxe apartment to rescue Leela. Fry and Bender find Leela in the castle’s tower, but her tentacles have grown to insane proportions and, as Bender says, “That’s nasty!”Bender bends the door open and the trio make their escape from the tower and straight into the genetically engineered laboratory. In the lab, they find a giant. For some reason Leela frees him from his shackles, and he fee fi fo fums them all over the place. They manage to dive down a drain, which leads to Momsanto’s headquarters. “Well, look what the giant cat dragged in? Memo to self—breed giant cat, to drag things in.”As Leela holds Momsanto’s henchmen in a headlock with her tentacles, Bender and Fry steer the cloudship with questionable skills.  But, Leela is able to grab onto the top of a building and swings everyone back to safety. Hurray! Momsanto lands in Leela and Fry’s precious moment to thank Leela for helping her to genetically engineer her beans. With suction cups so that the beanstalks don’t fall down. Then, she cures Leela of her squidification, which shuts Leela up about the unknown long-term effects of genetically modified thingamabobs.