Nicholas and Nina get to choose losing chefs to work as their sous chefs. Nicholas gets to choose first because he won the last challenge, and he picks Jason, Louis, and Brian. Nina chooses Shirley, Stephanie, and Travis.

Nicholas is cooking a meal that showcases classic and contemporary French technique, whereas Nina goes Italian with local ingredients. Nina throws in two extra courses, just because that’s how winners get it done.

Padma’s neck is being attacked by a bright red legwarmer.

With one hour left, Nina’s goat is “chewy as f***,” so the only thing she can do is braise the f*** out of it.

Nina starts off her service with a surprise course of breadfruit with whipped foie gras butter that delights the judges. The first course is tuna and escolar tartar and the diners can “taste the island.”

Over in Nicholas’s kitchen, service is a problem which means he feels the need to treat the waitstaff like crap. His hamachi and tuna with green apple falls a little flat. His second course is a sweet shrimp bisque with scallop noodles. The judges are confused about his use of scallops, so it’s not looking good for Nicholas.

Nina’s next dish is roasted goat ragu with orecchiette pasta, and  Tom says “the goat is perfectly cooked, I would come back for this dish.” I think he likes it, a lot. Nina’s third dish is swordfish with squash puree. It seems passable, but the diners are not impressed.

Back in the kitchen, Nicholas’s duck is a little tough but he has to serve it anyhow because there is no do-over in Top Chef. He serves the kombu-cured duck with squash, and it is received well by most of the judges. His last course is caramelized white chocolate panna cotta, and it’s not jiggling enough for Padma (that’s something she probably doesn’t hear a lot).

Nina again surprises her diners with a bonus round intermezzo of compressed dragon fruit with papaya infused simple syrup. Her dessert course is a chocolate zeppole with macadamia nut and toasted coconut glaze. It’s not enough for the judges, but only because it was so tasty that they want more.

The only thing worth mentioning about Nicholas’s second service (the judges visited both restaurants in two separate groups) is that there was a loud crash and Nicholas stopped in the middle of cooking to yell “Goddammit! Seriously?” and abuse the counter with a dishtowel, to the horror of the entire dining room. Now that is the Nicholas we have come to know.

It’s pretty clear that Nina is the winner, but let’s go through the formality of Judge’s Table in case Padma shows up in the string bikini heard ’round the world.  Sadly, Padma is fully clothed. Tom loved Nicholas’s scallop noodle dish, but Padma rolled her eyes because she couldn’t even taste any scallop. His panna cotta was underset. Then, the judges start in on Nina and suggest that they shouldn’t even judge her extra courses. There was really nothing bad to say about her cooking, except maybe the swordfish and the fact that her dessert was more of a little bite than a full dessert.

For some reason, the judges take a long time deliberating. Why are they pretending that they liked Nicholas’s jiggle-free panna cotta? Oh ha, the judges are now going to factor in Nicholas’s crappy treatment of his waitstaff. Ugh, it’s 1:00 a.m. and they’re still sitting at that stupid table, talking about food that has been fully digested.

Nineteen hours later, “Nick, you are Top Chef.” What? Are you kidding me with that crap, Padma? I mean, really. Really? The chef who specialized in temper tantrums all season gets rewarded for his bad behavior? Well, that’s disappointing. Ugh. Lame. Very lame.

So that wraps up another season of Top Chef. Let’s do this again, only with less Emeril, more Gail, and both more and less of Padma’s bikini.

The Quickfire Challenge is all about technique. The chefs have thirty-five minutes (so specific!) to prepare Jacques Pépin’s favorite dish—Dover sole, artichokes, and asparagus. But first, a demonstration. Zip bang boom, he prepares the delicious meal in no time flat. And now, it’s their turn. Ready, go!

So who screwed up? Well Nina forgot to turn her burners on, but she salvaged it pretty well, Carlos is missing the tomatoes and the sauce is…questionable, Shirley done good, as usual, Brian never finished a sauce, Stephanie put everything on the plate and Nicholas gets a “very good.” The winner of the coveted pride and immunity is Nicholas.

For the Elimination Challenge, it’s all about French and Spanish cuisine. Padma introduces Julian Serrano for Spain, and Dominique Crenn for France, who will act as mentors. The chefs will work in two teams to prepare a five-course meal in one of the two styles, using ingredients that feature in both. The team with the best overall meal will win, and someone from the losing team will be going home.

The French Team is Shirley, Nicholas, and Stephanie. The Spanish Team Nina, Brian, and Carlos. For the French Team, Dominique suggests an extraordinarily modern chocolate, duck, and a nest. So…good luck with that? Julian is talking about potato salad, which doesn’t sound very exciting at all.

Nicholas and Shirley are all over the French cuisine, but Stephanie is all sorts of confused. Over in Spain, Chef Serrano is micromanaging the three chefs in the menu and their prep. When the mentor chefs leave, the scurrying and scrambling kicks into high gear. Shirley busts out the liquid nitrogen for some ice cream, tarragon is flying on the Spanish side, and Nina fusses over her simple potato salad. As Brian says, “it’s old school versus new school.”

The first dish from France is Shirley’s snapper with dehydrated olives and ice cream, which seems odd for a first coarse. For Spain, it’s Nina’s ensaladilla rusa with green olives, shrimp, and potatoes. Tom doesn’t like the ice cream with the fish, but everyone enjoys Nina’s potatoes.

The second French dish is Stephanie’s pickled and poached mussels with gelée, and for Spain it’s Nina’s ajo blanco with almonds and cherries. Again, Nina receives high praise. Stephanie’s mussels had good flavor, but there was also some grit which is not a good thing.

The third dishes are Carlos’s mejillones a la romesco with crispy leeks, and Shirley and Stephanie’s chicken liver mouse with roasted chicken bouillon. The mousse gets mixed reviews but apparently the consummé is to die for, and Carlos’s dish is called one-note.

The fourth course is getting very hearty on the Spanish side, and very…weird…on the French side. There’s Carlos’s polo con arroz, and Nicholas and Stephanie’s Cornish game hen with spiced chocolate and corn silk nest. Carlos’s chicken is beautifully cooked and sounds delicious. And then, the French dish. Nobody other than Dominique want to eat the French dish, and Tom says it looks like what he used to pull out of the drain before he went completely bald.

Finally, dessert. There’s Brian’s flan de chocolate and strawberries that is overall too sweet, and Nicholas’s almond flan with plum and coconut crumble which is too…flanny?

The Spanish team gets called to Judge’s Table first, which means they are the chefs with the favorite dishes. And the winning chef is Nina with her perfectly executed potato salad. Huh.

And now, the French team. Since they cooked avant garde cuisine, they should all show up in avant garde headgear. But they don’t. Instead, they take their punishment with dignity. Except for Nicholas. He has immunity, so it’s between Shirley and Stephanie. Yet it is clear that Nicholas had the least favorite dishes with his chocolate chicken and his miserable dessert. Julian even suggests that Nicholas resign. But he doesn’t, so the judges are now comparing dishes they very much enjoyed. Tom hopes that Nicholas rethinks his decision and falls on his sword, but no dice. Stephanie, pack your knives and go home. The look Shirley gave Nicholas, wow. That says it all.

Next week, possum. Mmm.

Reprinted from HealthyWayToCook.com

We’re back, and we’ve dragged seven chefs with us through the bayou.  The Quickfire Challenge is an impossible task—cook crawfish etouffee for John Besh. In forty-five minutes. The task is made even more impossible for Stephanie, who has a severe shellfish allergy.

Nina made a hand-rolled noodle with a spicy crawfish broth, Carrie made a Spanish-style crawfish broth with white wine and chickpeas; Nicholas managed to stuff those little crawfish, and Padma hates it. Shirly made Singapore chili etouffee is the only one who made rice; Brian went fairly traditionsal, and Carlos missed the whole “smother your food” concept. Then, there’s Stephanie, who prepard crawfish bisque without ever actually tasting her food.

Carrie’s flavors were muddled, and Nicholas made more of a summer roll than an etouffee, and Stephanie kind of just made a soup. And Carlos, wow. He missed the mark. The winning dish is from Shirley, who has immunity and is totally going to win this entire competition.

For the Elimination Challenge, there’s a party for a seafood company and the chefs have to prepare dishes for two hundred guests highlighting at least two different kinds of seafood. But first, John Besh is taking the chefs to his home to cook a traditional Louisiana meal. Of course his house is gorgeous and lush and the kitchen is amazing and Stephanie loves his hair.

The next day, a seafood truck pulls up and the chefs start grabbing their fish. Shirley sees some tuna and decides to make ceviche, and Stephanie is working with fried oysters and tuna, Carrie chose oyster and flounder to make fritters, Nicholas has a fish I’ve never heard of and oyster foam, oyster juice, oyster sauce, it’s like Forrest Gump over here. Carlos is preparing sashimi but doesn’t have a sushi knife and is then annoyed because Nathan won’t lend him his knife, which, what? Bring your own knife or STFU. Of course he eventually guilts Nathan out of the knife, but whatever.  (Oh, ha! Carlos didn’t even clean it when he was done but instead left it all crusted up with fish which is why you never lend your tools!)

The guests arrive and the lines get long, at least for Stephanie who is frying her oysters on the spot. The chefs’ first stop is Brian’s station. He made swordfish with shrimp and onion puree. Tom looks happy, and a happy Tom is important. Nicholas has oyster leek soup, an oyster emulsion, and something else involving oyster that might be foam. It’s missing acid, and the judges are bored. Carrie has flounder croquets with oyster emulsion and pickled cucumber. Tom thinks it’s good, but he doesn’t get why you would smash up such a delicate fish like flounder. Shirley’s tuna and amberjack ceviche with pecans is a crowd-pleaser. Nina’s marinated wahoo with salsa verde is perfectly seared and she brought the best out of the fish. Carlos has amberjack ceviche with peach and pepper, and the judges find it under-seasoned. Stephanie’s fried oyster and tuna salad and the judges are impressed by the crispiness of the oyster.

The judges gather to discuss the dishes and there don’t really seem to be any loser. But, Carlos’s dish was a little light on the fish, and Nicholas’s foamy soupy thing fell flat. Also, Carrie’s croquette lost the integrity of the fish.

The top dishes are from Stephanie, Nina, and Brian. Though they all cooked delicious food, Stephanie gets the win for cooking Louisiana fish with the most passion. The bottom three dishes are from Nicholas, Carrie, and Carlos. Carrie got in trouble by smushing up the fish, which destroyed the integrity of the fish and made it taste like Anyfish. Carlos’s greatest sin was making “a peach dish, not a fish dish.” Nicholas had texture and acid issues, which is not a great thing when you’re working with oysters. And goodbye, Carrie. Huh. I had her in the finals. Well, maybe she’ll win Last Chance Kitchen, where some guy named Louis is the reigning champion.

Next week, it’s France vs. Spain.

Oh, Restaurant Wars. How much do I love thee? Eh, not so much, actually. It’s become a tad predictable—never do front of the house, and always have a complete dish to stand behind but not salad, because nobody ever wins Top Chef with a salad.

The guest judge is none other than David Chang, my most favorite chef ever (sorry Bourdain, my love for Chang runs deep). Danny Meyer will also be checking in on the chefs, so I guess that makes him a guest judge, too? The teams are:

Team One: Shirley, Nina, Carlos, Justin, Sara
Team Two: Everybody Else (or, Stephanie, Nicholas, Travis, Carrie, Brian)

Team Two decides on seafood, and Team One is still smashing egos so they go with “upscale casual.” But surprise! There are no kitchens in the restaurants. It looks like Team One totally forgot to discuss their dishes and instead jump straight into plate and chair selection. So…they’re planning dishes while food shopping? Priorities etc., good plan, guys!

Team One calls their restaurant “Found.” Justin is cooking rabbit, Carlos is making red snapper, Nina has pork tenderloin, Shirley is cooking ingredients I don’t recognize, and Sara is relying on a brown butter cake. Team Two’s restaurant is named “Fin.” Brian is making a scallop dish, Stephanie has oysters with pasta, Nicholas is roasting oxtail, and Travis is baking an olive oil cake.

The judges arrive at Fin and the dishes start flying. Brian’s scallop crudo and purple corn gel is called “snotty.” Over at Found, the wine takes a long time to get out and the menus are taken away before the diners even have a chance to see what they will be eating. Fin serves up Carrie’s sautéed shrimp with chickpea puree and Stephanie’s linguini with caviar and oyster cream. Carrie’s shrimp is called an “oil slick” but Stephanie’s pasta is a win.

Found is a mess. Like, a total mess. The wrong dishes are going out, Sara is blaming the kitchen and the kitchen is blaming Sara. Meanwhile, Fin serves Nick’s roasted drum and oxtail ragu. It is the judge’s favorite dish, and it is followed by Travis’s olive oil cake that they also love.

The judges immediately notice the fall-off in service at Found and have to ask Sara to check on the dishes. When Sara finally brings out the dishes, she leaves before explaining them so the judges have to guess what dish is from which chef. They hate everything, so I guess maybe it doesn’t really matter. Shirley’s fish dish with shrimp paste is served and Padma asks Sara for an explanation. They like the dish and call the shrimp paste the star of the show. Then, Sara brings out Nina’s pork and again leaves it without explaining the dish. It’s clear (to everyone except for Sara) that if this team does not have the winning dishes, Sara is going home.

Funny, but when Sara brings out her own nectarine brown butter cake, she explains the dish to the judges. Unfortunately, she has to explain that the promised mascarpone isn’t on the plate because the emulsion broke from the heat.

It’s now up to the judges to decide which restaurant did the better job. Unsurprisingly, Fin is the winning restaurant. Also unsurpringly, Nicholas wins restaurant wars for stepping up as the executive chef and also making a great dish.

Now, it’s time for Found. Padma calls it a disaster, and notes that she only volunteered information about her own dish. Sara insists there was disorganization in the kitchen, and Justin claims that the tickets were coming in slow and unclear. The judges are going to have to sort out if it’s Sara (front of the house) or Justin (executive chef) going home. They both screwed up their tasks, and they both had lousy dishes. I say send them both home (or maybe a good old fashioned knife fight), but the judges do something even better and send Sara home. She’s so smug.

Next week, squirrel!

Reprinted from HealthyWayToCook.com

The next challenge is all about collaboration—potluck style served at Kermit’s Treme Speakeasy. Something about Nicholas needing to be cleared by a doctor…did he slice off a limb? Because that’s the only way anyone ever voluntarily leaves Top Chef. The teams self-assemble as follows:

Green Team: Carrie, Nina, Stephanie, Carlos

Blue Team: Shirley, Louis, Justin, Sara

Gray Team: Travis, Brian, Patty, Nick

The Blue Team is going with “big fresh flavors,” including pickled radishes, braised beef, and hominy grits. The Grey Team has chicken and fish in the works, there’s something with watermelon and there are jokes about Nick being roided up. The Green Team is going Italian-style with lots of desserts because everyone loves dessert. There’s something about Nina making gnocchi again because I guess maybe she made gnocchi before, but isn’t there room in the world for more gnocchi? I had no idea there was a gnocchi quota.

The Blue Team pickled a lot of stuff, and the shrimp and grits look delicious. But some of the patrons note that the seasoning on the grits is a little off. The Gray Team lures in the love with fried chicken, watermelon salad, barramundi, and caramelized ribs. The fish is bland and dry, the ribs taste burnt, and the watermelon lacks seasoning. The Green Team has fried artichoke, gnocchetti, and tiramisu. Tom likes the artichokes, the gnocchi is called “fancy Hamburger Helper”, and the tiramisu is more of a trifle.

Padma asks to see the Grey Team first, but she wasn’t all sunshine and roses and it becomes clear that the Grey Team had their least favorite dishes. How do you not love fried chicken? Oh wait, the judges loved the fried chicken. The fish was overcooked, and the watermelon was bland. Although Travis’s grits were perfectly cooked, they lacked flavor.

The Grey Team is sent away and replaced by the Green Team which had the judges favorite dishes. Stephanie’s artichoke was a hit, and everyone loved the gnocchi (though the judges noted that this is her second gnocchi). The tiramisu was maybe a little off, but still, it’s dessert and nobody else made dessert. Stephanie’s artichokes take the win.

Brian has immunity, so the rest of the Grey Team is at risk. Nick made the lousy fish, Patty was responsible for the blah watermelon, and Travis screwed up the spice on the ribs. Patty is eliminated because come on, watermelon. It’s so simple. Slice it, season it, serve it.

Next week, that’s a whole pig and I heard someone say something about brisket.

Reprinted from HealthyWayToCook.com

The chefs have twenty minutes to make a dish that showcases a the Creole tomato. Very quickly it’s time’s up and spatulas down. There’s Bene’s tomato soup. Carlos’s poached tomatoes in olive oil with raw flowers, Stephanie’s tomato steaks, Nina’s chilled watermelon tomato soup, Nicholas’s caramelized melon with tomatoes in there somewhere, Justin’s tomato skin tartare with squash blossoms, Travis’s seared tomatoes with steak, Louis’s tomato seed bouillon, Brian’s toad in the hole, and Patty’s roasted tomatoes marinated in olive oil.

John’s least favorites are Patty’s mess, Stephanie’s lack of imagination, and Travis’s safe tomatoes. John’s favorites are Nina’s chilled soup, Carlos’s tomato salad, and Louis’s big, bold flavors. The win goes to Nina, who is safe from elimination. Again.

For the next challenge, the chefs must bring the farm to the table in only ninety minutes. They will be cooking at La Provence and must prepare one dish that for who knows what reason must incorporate a certain brand of cream cheese that is not at all fresh or local.

There are limited ingredients in the pantry, basically whatever is in season plus UNLIMITED CREAM CHEESE. So that’s like a challenge within a challenge. The chefs unlucky enough to choose the entrée for their dishes have it tough. There’s really only so much you can do with cream cheese, plus there’s no butter in the pantry.

For the appetizers, Patty made snapper crudo with cream cheese vinaigrette (fish and cheese?), Brian much more wisely made summer squash and zucchini with poached oysters and emulsified cream cheese (oysters and cream cheese?), Carlos prepared poached beets and pickled carrots with peach, habanero and cream cheese sauce, Nina fried up some crispy zucchini blossoms with eggplant and cream cheese puree, and Sara cooked lamb rack stuffed with cream cheese. Sara’s lamb was everybody’s least favorite because it was undercooked and wrongly seasoned. Otherwise, the dishes seem to have passed muster.

For the entrees, Bene made roasted chicken breast filled with caramelized onions and tarragon cream cheese, Carrie cooked vinegar-braised chicken in cream cheese sauce with chilled cucumber, Justin prepared roasted duck breast with eggplant vinaigrette, mushrooms, and corn puree, and Travis made seared lamb chops with succotash and cream cheese aioli. Carrie’s dish is called “loopy and soupy,” and Bene’s dish confused everyone. Travis’s lamb is inconsistently cooked, and Justin’s dish was good but no one could find the cream cheese.

Padma looks like she’s ready for dessert. You know what makes a good dessert? CREAM CHEESE. Louis made graham crackers with blackberries and cream cheese mousse, Nicholas fried funnel cake and carrot cake with peach flavored cream cheese, Shirley baked a steamed egg custard with macerated blueberries, and Stephanie prepared a cream cheese, peach and cherry mousse with cream cheese short dough. Stephanie’s custard is “broken on many levels,” and Louis’s graham crackers were beyond soggy. The judges think that Nicholas’s funnel cake showed off the cream cheese the best.

Nina, Nicholas, and Justin had the best dishes. The winner is Nina for her delicious fried squash blossoms. This is Nina’s fourth win which I’m guessing is a lot. The worst dishes are from Bene, Sara and Travis. Sara’s excuses fall short, Bene’s vegetables were steamed which apparently is a huge no-no, and Travis’s plate was just plain sloppy. Bene is eliminated for his unforgivable vegetables.

Next week, it’s musical chairs in the Top Chef kitchen.

 

Eggs, mustard, strawberries, leeks, lamb chops, pineapple, baking soda, carrots, canned beans, ginger, avocado, good luck with that, kids.  Gail’s mom’s team is up first with a lamb loin chop with cheddar fondue. There’s also red snapper with pilaf and sake and a compressed buratta with pickled apples. Padma’ s mom’s team made clams with coconut cream and fish sauce, snapper papillote with mustard, soup with beans, carrots, cherries, and the kitchen sink. The winning dishes were prepared by Padma’s mom’s team because who doesn’t like clams in coconut cream.

For the Elimination Challenge, high maintenance starlet Lea Michele arrives and forces the contestants to host her Halloween party. The chefs will be working in teams of two and prepare two dishes. Ugh, she’s a freaking vegan, but she does allow herself a cheese break. Really living life to the fullest there, Lea.

To get into the spirit of Halloween, there’s liquid nitrogen, black garlic, and purple cauliflower. There are three arancinis, two gnocchis, and countless risottos so this is definitely going to be the best dinner party ever. And even though Lea Michele declared her hatred of beets, there’s beet pasta.

The costumed guests arrive, with Padma in a gigantic feathered headpiece. I rewound like three times, and the best I can do is…Padma called herself a “boodoo preesuss.” So she’s either drunk, or stoned. Lea Michele in the never original kitty cat ears. Ugh. If you’re the host of a Top Chef costume party and the best you can do is kitty cat ears, it’s like you’re announcing to the world that you are the least interesting person on the planet. Remember that, in case you’re ever the host of a Top Chef costume party.

Carrie and Stephanie make “doomed shrooms” and ash coated vegetables with fontina. Tom is very impressed with the graveyard look. Nicholas made butternut squash cannoli, and his teammate Patty made lemon arancini. It was deemed “not spooky at all.” Brian made crispy quinoa and Bene made a heirloom tomato salad which they call scary spa cuisine but Tom call it underseasoned and boring. Nina prepared candy corn from gnocchi and kale and her teammate Michael made a bloody eye from arancini and tomato jam. Tom loves the gnocchi and the red sauce was too sweet. Travis made vegetable ceviche and Carlos made goat cheese fondu. They’re celebrating the dead, so ooooh, scary. Louis made a severed thumb out of quinoa, and Shirley made a worm salad. Justin made blood pasta from the dreaded beets, and Sara made another evil eye out of arancini. Tom is bored with the rice eyeballs.

The top teams are Nicholas and Patty, and Carlos and Travis. The winning chefs are Carlos and Travis because they listened to what Lea wanted and delivered her food according to her very specific instructions.

The bottom two teams are Michael and Nina, and Brian and Bene. Lea claims she wanted the opposite of spa cuisine, because vegans cheating on their self-imposed diets don’t like salads. They like cheese. Cheese, cheese, cheese. And possibly bacon. Michael lost the battle of the arancini, and Nina gets flack for not helping her teammate. Michael is sent packing for his lousy rice balls.

Next, a chefy field trip to a farmhouse table.

Reprinted from HealthyWayToCook.com

Eddie Huang is the guest judge and takes the chefs on a party bus around New Orleans to learn about Vietnamese cuisine. I mean that’s how everyone soaks up a culture, right? Their first stop is a bakery for bahn mi sandwiches. Next are the shrimp docks to watch the catch arrive. Shirley is clever and asks the Vietnamese fishermen’s wives for recipes. The last stop is a noodle house, and now I’m hungry.

Shirley is ably heading up the Red Team. Along with Captain Vietnam and Sara, who worked for Wolfgang Puck, the Green Team has Bene who is preparing traditional Vietnamese cooking with tomato sauce but definitely not at all lemongrass. The Orange Team looks pretty solid with some soups, but there’s still potential for failure.

Time is up, food is served.

The Orange Team presents black pepper fried squid, gulf shrimp and pork belly spring role, fish head soup with pineapple and tomato, beef broth pho. The spring roll is called “almost dead on,” but the tomato in the soup makes it taste like minestrone. Tom misses the aromatics in the pho, which are nonexistent.

The Red Team is next. They serve raw beef salad with pickled vegetables, Vietnamese barbeque shrimp, beef pho with rice noodles and lettuce, and lemon custard with caramelized bahn mi.  The judges are very impressed with the pho dish, and Shirley’s shrimp dish is amazing. The raw beef salad is not traditionally Vietnamese, and the custard is called an afterthought.

The Green Team is last with their lemongrass-free meal which includes grilled pork sausage with lettuce wrap, oxtail rice wrap with pork and shrimp, fresh gulf shrimp with ginger Vietnamese tomato sauce, and coconut macaroon with coffee flavors. The judges seem underwhelmed. Then Padma wants to know if we can “talk about this atrocious rice,” and Gail thinks the macaroon tastes like something she has every year at her seder.

The Red Team had the judges’ favorite dishes. Shirley’s shrimp dish was a surprising hit since the judges did not expect to find so much butter in Vietnamese cooking. Shirley explained that everyone on the shrimp dock said that they cooked their shrimp in butter. She gets the win, and Justin’s pho gets honorable mention.

Then the judges want to see the Green Team. Sara immediately reaches for tears over how much she loves Asian cuisine and just love Asian cuisine, and did she mention how much she loves Asian cuisine? Well if you love it so much, Sara, maybe stop butchering it! Travis claims that he has had an Italian sauce in central Vietnam over and over and over again and it totally baffles the judges who suggest that the next time he is in central Vietnam, he should maybe try not going to Italian restaurants. Sara falls on the sword of the horribly cooked rice, and really, getting rice wrong is Vietnamese cooking is unforgivable. Yet somehow it’s Janine who is going home for double frying the shrimp, so I’m confused. I guess she only knows how to cook shrimp on the barbie.

Next week, Padma’s mommy and Lea Michele hosts a Halloween costume party.

Reprinted from HealthyWayToCook.com

• Kale
  Kale, smoked, egg on top, and bacon. Bacon? How can bacon be a trend when it is made from love and deliciousness?

• An Egg On Top
  There’s a raw duck egg (which maybe is undercooked), a scotch egg, a soft boiled egg with chili flakes, and a rice congee with shirred egg.

• Smoked
  Smoked chile over tuna tataki, cold-smoked oysters, roasted pork loin with smoked apples, and smoked trout.

• Bacon
  Bacon! Seared tuna in bacon fat, bacon with scallop (booooring!), bacon and scallops in pho (still booooring!), halibut with crispy bacon vinaigrette, and pasta with candied bacon.

Ugh, Kale. Kale with toasted garlic, kale with anchovies and something else, fried kale with soy, and kale juice and gazpacho with kale salad.

The winner is Shirley with her egg dish (the rice congee with shirred egg). Then Aaron gets booted out of the competition with his overdressed kale. It’s not you, Aaron, it’s the kale.

And there’s another Elimination Challenge. The chefs will cook at Commander’s Palace. The challenge is to recreate some of the restaurant’s dishes:

• Shrimp and Tasso

• Seared Trout

• Emeril’s Veal Chop

• A Strawberry Trio

After tasting the above dishes, the chefs work in groups of three or four to recreate what they’ve only tasted once. They begin their prep with a chef from Commander’s Palace hovering in the background. In other words, it’s a little tense in the kitchen.

Nina accidentally grabbed Michael’s plates and began plating her dish, so instead of using Nina’s plates, Michael dumped Nina’s food on the floor. Very mature. Someone stole Shirley’s yellow beets, and Brian thinks he took them by accident. There’s a lot of chaos, but food somehow gets on the plate.

First up is the shrimp dish, and it’s amazing how close the dishes look, yet each of the four versions are off in different ways. The seared trout is served next. There’s a lot of underseasoned dishes, and some poorly cooked trout. Mmm…veal chops…..some are well cooked, others are overcooked, there’s one with no sear, and the great sin of raw sprouts. Finally, strawberries with strawberries and strawberries. There are some yummy looking biscuits and beignets on those plates, and the judges are beyond pleased.

Justin’s beignets are a huge hit (which is no surprise since he’s a local chef). Michael’s shrimp was overcooked, and Brett missed the grill marks on his veal. Louis’s entire dish was underseasoned, and Carlos’s fish was burned and underseasoned.

Stephanie, Nina, and Justin are called to the Judge’s Table because their dishes came closest to the Commander’s Palace originals. Justin gets the win and he’s “super stoked” which is like regular stoked with an extra scissor kick. The worst dishes are from Louis, Carlos, and Brett. Louis didn’t even taste his food and all of Brett’s veal was overcooked. Brett uses the excuse that he was the last one to use the grill so it was way too hot. Excuses, excuses. Please pack your knives and go, Brett.

Next week, the chefs go shrimping and get a lesson in Vietnamese cuisine.

Padma: I know you’re all tired from the elimination challenge that ended about four minutes ago and still reeling from seeing me, the Great Goddess Padma, in person, but we’re in New Orleans and I’ve got the munchies, so go make me some gumbo. Now!

Chef #8: Uh, what’s a gumbo?

Chef #4: I think it’s like Asian fusion, but with crawfish.

Chef #6: It’s easy, you just chop up a bunch of meat and toss it in a slow cooker. [Yawns] I’ll see you guys tomorrow.

Chef #11: Well I’m, like, from New Orleans, so whatever I cook is automatically a gumbo.

Chef #4: Exactly. Asian fusion, man! Asian fusion!

The exhausted chefs went back to their house to cook Padma her gumbo. Magically, their kitchen was equipped with all of the ingredients their little hearts desired and about a dozen or so slow cookers. Chopping, stirring, simmering, and the chefs were ready to serve their gumbo or, more accurately, “gumbo” to their famished queen and her guest, local chef and legend Leah Chase.

Here’s a list of things that are not gumbo that chefs tried to pass off as gumbo:

• Drunken chicken
• Braised pork belly
• Australian curry
• Hot and sour prawns
• Pork rib with okra
• Puerto Rican mofongo with sofrita
• New England and Miami fried clam chowder
• Iownan Trinidadian corn crumble
• Chipole something
• Polish stewed cabbage and dried beets
• Plantain and yuca
• Moroccan lamb shank
• Crab and silken tofu

For some strange reason, Leah really enjoyed Carrie’s corn crumble, so that is the winning gumbo.

Unfortunately for the chefs, Padma is still hungry and commands them to cook in food trucks for herself and the volunteers from Habitat For Humanity who are still working hard to rebuild New Orleans. There are lots of fish ideas being tossed around which, I don’t know. They call it “street meat” for a reason. The Yellow Team is making a taco truck, the Green Team is slicing up watermelon, the Red Team has a south Florida/Southern United States thing going, and the Blue Team has a beach theme with grilled fish.

Tom, Gail, Padma, and some woman in a striped shirt show up for some lunch. They start with the Yellow Team’s beef and pork empanadas and ceviche and them move on to tilapia tacos. The empanadas are a huge hit, and the cold ceviche was refreshing. It’s time for the Blue Team who serves up a salmon roll, grilled shrimp with melon, coconut ceviche and a tun a slider. The cold ceviche was ruined by hot plantains, the slider was under-seasoned, and the salmon roll was premade and soggy.

The Red Team has a green gazpacho with pickled shrimp, lobster and crab fritters, jerk chicken sandwiches, and ricotta with burnt honey and stone fruit. The judges are saying words like “love” and “delicious.” Lastly, the Green Team with their ahi tuna burger, crispy chickpea salad, tuna burger, spicy grilled lamb salad, and an amuse bouche of chilled watermelon. Padma licked her fingers after eating the lamb dish, which I think means whomever made it is her new pet.

The judges give the win to the Yellow Team, with the big prize going to Carrie’s efforts in making the empanada. And the losing team is the Blue Team with their surfside lunch truck. The coconut ceviche wasn’t cold enough and Jason’s salmon hand roll was rolled ahead of time so that he could be a handsome host. Then there’s something about the tomato on Patti’s tuna slider, and Nicholas’s garnish was all wrong.

Since you can’t send someone home for garnish or tomatoes, it’s between Brett and Jason. Because not making a dish to order is unforgivable on Top Chef, Jason packs his knives and leaves with an eyeroll. “I’m not the worst, I know that for a fact.” Keep reaching for the stars, Jason.

Next week, an elimination Quickfire and some chefs get underminey.